The Blue Towel

Early Summer 1981

My sister was going to work for another foster family for the summer- babysitting all of their foster kids and I was working YCC. I had been using the same blue towel since arriving at my new home in May of 1971. Originally all three of us girls used the same blue towel and often times it was soaked by the time the last one us took a shower so it didn't do much good. We all took showers within minutes of each other and sometimes we were timed. We were not allowed to wash our hair in the shower and actually only allowed to wash it once a week which was Saturday so it would look good for church on Sunday.

Their daughter who was four months younger than me had her own towel of course she had her own bedroom as well while me and my two older sisters shared the same room just like we shared the same towel for four years. I believe it was the summer of 1975 when my oldest sister finally was given a different towel - a yellow towel to be precise. So for four years we all used the blue towel and all the while they had many towels not being used by anyone.

Well it was the autumn of 1977 when my oldest sister actually left home to attend a private Christian school for her last two years so my other sister (the middle one) inherited the yellow towel. I had to continue to use the blue towel and trust me when I say "it was wearing a little thin".

So here it was the beginning of summer of 1981 and I guess Mom didn't want the other foster home to see what they were providing us so my sister got a new towel to take with her for her summer job and finally I guess realizing that holes didn't do much for drying off a body they relented their hold on the blue towel and it "became a rag" and I was given the yellow towel which had been used by my two sisters (one for two years and the other one used it for four years.

For 10 years plus I used the same blue towel and yes it irks me to this day that I was forced into such depravity when these people had more to give. I know many people have less but the point of this story and all these stories is not for pity but for understanding. Why would you treat foster children so different from your own. Why become foster parents just to belittle and degrade and to act hostile toward them. Did they think we were idiots and wouldn't observe this. We argued with them all the time trying to be treated even semi equally. Never once did I ever think I was less than they were even though I feel that at the time they thought they were superior. Times have definitely changed and I must say that I am angry writing this post because it seems so minute - not my feelings but the little things they did to try to make us feel less than!!